Apartment Hunting In SF: A Haiku In Five Parts / 22 March 1997
Before I begin my mini-epic, let me provide a bit of context. First, POP QUIZ:
No. 1: Which is the bigger waste of time?
No. 2: Cutthroat scavengers who use underhanded, amoral techniques to create the illusion that they are more attractive potential tenants than I are:
No. 3: Looking for an apartment AND a job in San Francisco AT THE SAME TIME is:
Pencils up! I’m sorry if you had trouble with this quiz, since it was a little tricky. The correct answer to Nos. 1-3 is ALL OF THE ABOVE.
Now, the epic haiku in five parts:
Part I: Wandering Through the Blissful, Childlike Forest of My Own Naivete
I need a new place
Part II: Like Odysseus, My Journey is Fraught With Peril & Adventure
What? I can’t afford
Part III: The Enemy is Cunning & My Weapon is Dull
Part IV: Embrace the Sweet Solace of Desperation
No indoor plumbing?
Part V: Do You Know the Way to San Jose?
O San Francisco