The Freshening / 19 May 2005

True story here about me sneezing just now? And wondering what exactly would happen to the mint that was currently dissolving in my mouth during all this? So I sneeze — radly — and then like come to and start putting together the shattered pieces of my life etc. and feel around and there’s no mint in my mouth as far as I can tell. And I do a fairly thorough examination of my immediate surroundings and find no mint or mint shrapnel. So Q.E.D. the force of my sneeze totally disintegrated the mint. And as I was opening the Stickie file where I keep epitaph ideas (“Joshua Allen: His head was a science experiment”), my shirt got caught against the edge of this desk here and something fell out and I thought I’d snapped a button off but no it was the mint. THE MINT I WAS TALKING ABOUT EARLIER IN THIS PARAGRAPH. I guess it’d gotten stuck on my shirt. Ha ha, you! You mint you. And then I re-ate it! Yeah basically living on the edge and not caring whether I lived or died. I was all giving the finger to the 3-second rule, I guess. Do you find me interesting and dangerous.

Previously / CHX
Next / Whatever Disintegration

Joshua Green Allen

Fireland is a rickety old website by Joshua Allen.

A novel called Chokeville and a beverage-review site called The Knowledge For Thirst.

A great deal of typing is collected in the Archive.

Articles and whatnot for other sites, including The Morning News, Wired, and McSweeney's, can be found in External.

I've been involved in a number of Epiphany Sink pictures.

I record music under the name Orifex.

The RSS feed is here.

Join the notify list for extremely infrequent updates via email.

The Sexiest Sentence Alive, Fireland Broke My Will To Live, The Black Pill Diaries, and a sampling of Old Fireland Designs.

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